No, I am not an organ donor. Nor do I donate blood.
How much do you hate me for those sentences?
I understand why organ donor stickers are on driver's licenses. A car accident is the place most of us are likely going to kick the bucket away from people that know us, so it's the place strangers are most urgently going to need to know what we intend to do with our bits when we shuffle off. But my license has no 'Organ Donor' sticker on it, nor have I a blood donor card. Whenever blood drives come up at schools, workplaces, or elsewhere, I am always accosted, and I always have to decline.
"I'm sorry," I say. "I'm afraid not."
Sometimes I offer to make a monetary donation, if I have small change and I can spare it. Lately I've been skint ass broke so I wouldn't be able to do that. But people don't hear any of that. They just here 'no', and assume I'm some kind of monster.
"How could you refuse babies and old women a blood donation?? You heartless fuck! Oh my god! I hope when you get into the train wreck I'm wishing on you right now, that someone nicer and more selfless and more mature than you donated blood so you don't fucking die even though you deserve it!!"
I don't get that reaction from organ donor people very often, but when I do it's just as virulent. No organ donor sticker? ONOES. Sometimes they try and be passive-aggressive about it and ask, "Oh, did your organ donator sticker fall off your license? You can call and they'll give you another!"
You sneaky little self-righteous doodyhead.
"No, I don't have a donation sticker. I'm not an organ donor."
Cue: one rant.
Here's the thing.
I want to donate blood and organs. I would love to be able to.
But it's illegal.
No, I'm not sick--neither am I a religion that would prevent me doing so. (Which is the dumbest cop-out in the universe, for anything, may I just say?)
I lived in the UK during the 90s when there was a lot of hubbub about Mad Cow Disease. Beef imports from Europe were really heavily regulated elsewhere in the world until as late as the year 2000. (Even though, to my knowledge, it wasn't anywhere near the epidemic proportions the news made it seem.) Because of the continued paranoia by the US about forrun fuuds, anybody that lived there for more than six months between 1989 and 1996 is legally prohibited, for fear of Mad Cow spreading, from donating blood or organs.
The reason I don't donate is because I can't. It is illegal. For the record, there is nothing wrong with me. But the US doesn't want me donating life-saving bits because of some mildly annoyed bovines.
Bonus points: I don't donate a kidney specifically because I get kidney stones. Any kidney I donate would be faulty and if I got another kidney stone (or the recipient did), it would be a lot harder and more painful to live with and potentially fatal because there's just the one kidney now.
Same goes for lung donation--I have asthma. I can hardly get on with both of my lungs. With one? I would be fucked.
I can't donate organs or blood. I am not a bad person. I'm just obeying the law. I've thought to see if I can talk to the British Embassy or something about donating blood for them since Americans don't want mine, but I keep forgetting to do it. Either way, no one wants my organs.
But that has nothing to do with me being an ass.
Now you, please, stop being one yourself.
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